So, without further ado, let's dig in! Today, we are talking about Manboobs. Yes. Manboobs. We are going to talk about big, floppy man jugs. (and maybe a little about chick boobs). So, one might ask, why are we talking about man titties? It's because I am very angry at the society we have crafted. And also I'm gay. Quick sidebar here: I've been watching Modern Family and there's a gay couple Mitchell and Cameron. Mitchell is the more traditional husband, working and emotionally unavailable, while Cameron is as gay as you get with the floppy hands, pink shirts. Cameron is also pretty fat and has manboobs. This got me thinking...does the "man" in a gay couple find man boobs of his more "female" partner attractive? Are man boobs the chick boobs of Gays? Holy shit. Okay, moving on.
Seriously, what the fuck. Chicks get told off in the work place for a little cleavage and this guy is out here with his lady lumps? Under every SAGGING man boob displayed in public is DELIGHTFUL moist, damp collection of sweat, dirt and mold. What is wrong with our society? The guy into the photo might be a loser, but I'll tell you who's the biggest loser is:
The manboob invasion is not just happening in public, but this it is happening in fucking television too. This man is form Survivor: Nicaragua. His name is Jimmy Johnson and I want to kill myself. Survivor is one of the best examples of the manboob invasion. I am a big fan of the show, and every season, there is some fat Jewish attorney or doctor with just a sac of sagging fat hanging down from his chest.
Why do we let this happen to us? Seriously. I was watching the same season, I think this is season 18, and one of the chicks was bending down a little too low and you could see some cleavage. That cleavage got censored down to oblivion faster than you can say "boner kill".
They're fucking not. They're disgusting the more they get shown on television, the less taboo it will be. Those of you who read this who are parents, it's not the chick boobs you have to watch out for when watching TV with your kid, it's those huge, moist and sweaty man titties that will scar your children for life. Chick boobs are healthy, manboobs are not.
I can make a pretty fucking good argument that it is more emotionally scarring for the world to show man boobs than chick boobs. Which would you rather your 6 year old son see? Chick tits, which is something he's going to be feeling up come 16 years old, or the fat UDDERS of some out-of-shape attorney? Most people would say chick boobs, because they're normal.
All in all, I don't care if you're a dude or a chick, it's either you need a sports fucking bra or you don't. Stop being the narcissistic, lazy, man-boob-wielding assholes that you are and put on a fucking shirt. Thank you.
Once again, you don't need an account to comment, just pop in your name and send some lovin' my way, thanks for reading and tell me what you think in the comments section!